Internal Family Systems (IFS) is an integrative psychotherapy that is non-pathologizing and evidence-based (IFS Institute, 2023). It is informed by family systems theory, person-centered therapy, strength-based approach, narrative therapy, existentialism, spirituality, and attachment theory.
IFS was developed by family systems psychologist Dr. Richard Schwartz in the early 1980’s as a response to hearing clients refer to “parts” of themselves in complex relationships that mirrored external family dynamics (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020). This led Schwartz to categorize three behavioral types of parts as managers, firefighters and exiles (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020).
To understand how to work with your multiplicity, the Internal Family Systems model differentiates the categories of parts we have in our internal system and guides us in the process of discerning how to be with the burdens or the extreme tendencies in our system in a way that allows space to listen without judgement and understand the good intentions that are driving parts’ thoughts, feelings and behaviors. In doing so, we lead out parts to update beliefs, release patterns that are no longer serving the highest good of the system, and re-integrate parts that have been excessively burdened and exiled to the far reaches of our psyche. Ultimately, guiding us back into a state of collaboration and wholeness in our being.
Goals of the Model:
Liberate parts from their extreme roles
Restore trust in Self (Self-Leadership)
Coordinate and harmonize the Self and the parts so they collaborate as a team to achieve balance and wholeness
To bring more Self energy to external systems (as an individual heals, their Self energy can be healing for others and the world)
(Finney, 2024)
Relational Existence
Inspired by the work of Daniel Siegel (2023), let’s consider the three realms of relational existence as: inner (one’s own internal experience), inter (the dynamic relationship between things), and intra (inclusion of inner and inter as we expand into the transpersonal dimension). Let’s break these down with the framework of IFS.
INNER - The inner experience is depicted by the presence of "parts", which encapsulates our multiplicity. Parts are distinct aspects of one’s individual personality, of which can be in drastic opposition with each other, or can work collaboratively. They each have their own story and personality in many ways - versions of oneself per se. Inherited and developed over our lifetime, each part expresses with their own beliefs, unique perspectives, emotions, capacities and roles. We can simplify this with the common expression: “a part of me feels x, while another part of me feels y.”
INTER - Each part has a complex story, schema and history that impacts the relationships between parts, and between an individual’s Higher Self and parts. Some parts carry burdens (or stored ruptures) that have a frequency of dysregulation attached, and this vulnerability is often protected by other parts to avoid constant overwhelm. Some parts are in direct conflict with other parts, sometimes due to differing values or beliefs in regard to how this internal system should be led or what actions should be avoided. Other parts have been liberated and are able to engage collaboratively, creatively and with a strong sense of Higher Self energy projecting from within them. When there is a lot of stress present in the system, parts have a tendency to revert to an extreme role as a desperate attempt to control, manage, and protect the most vulnerable aspects in the system (i.e. the inner children). By being relational with our inner system, engaging inter-connectively as Higher Self to parts, we can guide a re-integration for the parts that have been isolated or separated. To be relational requires qualities like listening to understand, allowing space for emotional expression, and wise guidance to foster self-awareness and collaboration.
INTRA - Siegel (2023) refers to ‘intraconnection’ as an integration of the transpersonal experience by way of the intra-personal reality which is inseparable from our interconnected nature. This is a both/and transcendence that includes and expands on the individual experience as inseparable from that which is unseen and mysterious. Within the IFS framework, this reflects the experience of Self as the core essence of the individual's psyche, that which we all share, and aligning with multiple Indigenous and ancient wisdom and contemplative teachings, it is that from which we all come from. It is the unshakable and undamaged inner-stability that is both a wave-like state that we can emanate as well as feel enveloped and embraced by. It can also be embodied as a more solidified secure attachment figure that interacts and turns towards our parts (and the parts of others) with expansive, heart-led qualities signified as the 8 C’s and 5 P’s.
8 C’s: Compassion, Clarity, Curiosity, Creativity, Confidence, Calm, Centeredness, Connectedness
5 P’s: Playfulness, Peace, Presence, Persistence, Patience
Using his knowledge and experience in family systems therapy, Schwartz focused on healing the relationships between the sub-personalities or parts presenting in the client (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020). In doing so, client’s access qualities of the 8 C’s and 5 P’s, which are affiliated with one’s innate spiritual essence (Janes et al., 2022) and serves as the internal attachment figure for parts to come back into healthy relationship with (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020).
“Parts” of the Model
Managers and Firefighters serve to protect the internal system from the pain and flames of the wounds held by exiles. Both managers and firefighters are trying to maintain balance, safety, and order within the system, which includes keeping exiles separate, isolated and out of conscious awareness (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020). Destructive, violent, or defensive reactions are sign-posts of managers and firefighters doing their job of keeping otherwise overwhelming emotions (i.e., exiles) at bay (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020). The more exiles one has, the bigger and stronger these protectors will be. The more we release these stored traumas, wounds, or burdens, the more space opens in our system, revealing more Higher Self energy.
Managers use logic, over-thinking and control as their protective strategies, while firefighters use more drastic, harmful, and impulsive measures to keep the emotional pain of the exile out of conscious awareness (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020).
Managers tend to express with the need to maintain control, to hold everything together, to problem solve and fix by over-thinking and analyzing. This is often experienced as perfectionism, self-criticism, self-judgement, excessive busy-ness or avoidance, all in an attempt to manage internal and external stressors.
Firefighters serve the role of strong reactive responses to subdue and avoid the flames of distress when the managers’ attempts have not kept that pain and discomfort at bay. They express with impulsive, compulsive, distracting behaviors, such as substance use/abuse, binge eating, dissociation, or self-harm. Their primary function is to extinguish emotional pain and protect the individual from overwhelming feelings.
Exiles are parts of the psyche that are young and vulnerable and are carrying the sensitive and heavy emotional burdens from the past (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020). Exiles hold the pain and limiting beliefs of separation that were caused by traumatic events and ruptures that have not been repaired. Sometimes they hold specific memories of past experiences that have been difficult or overwhelming for the individual to process, other times they hold non-verbal, somatic sensations that have been passed down intergenerationally.
Fatimah Finney (2024) shares that rather than trying to be in Self all the time, it’s helpful to consider instead that we are the dynamic relational space where Self and parts are learning to work together. For many of us, this is a process where Self is learning how to be the leader of the system and our parts are learning how to let go of control and fear and open up to allowing this leadership. It is through our parts that we feel more Self, and as we are in relationship with them they learn that they can soften and step back as Self energy leads more fully (Finney, 2024).
References:
Finney, F. (2024). Self, spirituality & social justice. IFS: A tool for liberation. IFS Institute.
IFS Institute. (2023). About us. https://ifs-institute.com/about-us
Janes, E. E., Trevino, Z. R., Koehl, H., & Hung, Y.-H. (2022). Internal family systems and spirituality: Implications for supervision. Contemporary Family Therapy, 45(2), 218–227. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10591-021-09625-2
Schwartz, R. C., & Sweezy, M. (2020). Internal family systems therapy (2nd ed.). The Guilford Press.