**This post is adapted from a paper I wrote with three classmates in my MSW program looking at the benefits of a self-compassion scale in clinical practice. Thank you Katrina Florez, Jessica Park, and Julia Sitter for your contribution.
the way back to our sustainable well of well-being and wisdom
One of the greatest follies of scientific thinking is the perpetuation of the mind-body separation. Some suggests that this may have begun during the process of colonization, as worldwide, for generations, people who lived in connection with their land, spirit, their bodies, and each other were violently torn from their ways of being. Menakem (2021) suggests this this process of colonization resides within each of us as an embodied remembering in the form of a toxin, while Wong (2018) suggests the legacy remains as the experience of the separation of mind and body. Siegel (2021) adds to this discourse by highlighting the impact as the illusion of the solo-self (Siegel, 2023). As such, it seems wise to focus on models of practice and healing that focus on embodiment and unveiling the bodymind as inseparable. Self-Compassion is one such practice.
Why Self-Compassion?
Research suggests that self-compassion is a key indicator of well-being in its dynamic and relational practicality, generating an ability to moderate reactions to negative events by way of increased awareness and cognitive understanding (Neff, 2003a). As a skill that is both a state of being and an applicable trait in action, self-compassion can be developed and increased through modeling by an attuned other, deliberate training, and teaching (Hayes et al., 2016). Self-compassion has been shown to be inversely linked to worry, anxiety, depression, disordered eating, compulsions and severity of addiction, and overall psychological symptomatology (Hayes et al., 2016, p. 407). Furthermore, self-compassion is linked to the development of emotional resilience that leads to greater hope and happiness (Raes et al., 2011).
The positive effects of self-compassion interventions are also observed physiologically. Studies that have looked at the effects of electrical activity in the brain during practices of compassion have revealed the presence of high gamma waves (Villamil et al, 2018, p. 8). Gamma wave activity is an elevated brain state that links and synchronizes differentiated areas of the brain, associated with “mental processes such as working memory, conscious perception, attention, and learning” (Villamil et al, 2018, p. 8). Research suggests that this brain wave state facilitated by compassion increases “synaptic growth and demonstrates improvement in neural integration”, both of which are key targets of healing in various interventions for treating various mental health disorders (Villamil et al, 2018, p. 8).
What is Self-Compassion?
The West commonly understands compassion as a willingness and ability to feel other’s suffering as well as a desire to help ease that suffering (Neff, 2003b). Self-compassion, on the other hand, is more closely linked to Buddhist traditions of mindfulness as a relational practice of turning towards one’s own pain and suffering with non-judgmental understanding to offer connection, care, and kindness (Raes et al., 2011; Neff, 2003b). Self-compassion may be a more appropriate construct to focus on practicing and developing rather than self-esteem, as the former encourages reflection of one’s humanity and connection to others, compared to the individualistic lens of self-esteem (Neff, 2003b). When the foundational cultural narrative is individualistic and remains unquestioned, self-esteem and experiences of oneness have been shown to carry the increased risk of amplifying authoritarianism, narcissism, hierarchical and harmful use of power (Devenot, 2023). Self-compassion practices very well may be an important anti-dote.
Neff and colleagues (2003, p. 38) conceptualize self-compassion as “a holistic state of mind representing the balance of compassionate responding (CS) and non-compassionate responding (RUS)”, composed of self-kindness versus self-judgement, a sense of common humanity versus isolation, and mindfulness versus overidentification. Intervention studies have shown that the six components of self-compassion are conceptually distinct but mutually impact one another, and thus training changes all six components at roughly the same magnitude, at the same time (Neff et al., 2003).
Common Humanity vs. Personal Isolation
Common humanity refers to a process of expanding out from one’s own experience to recognize that it is human nature to make mistakes, to struggle, and to have moments of suffering (Hayes et al., 2016). This perspective lends itself towards the universal experience of humankind and shifts one from isolation into interconnectivity.
Mindfulness vs. Over-Identification
Within the context of self-compassion, mindfulness is understood as “a moment-to-moment awareness of one’s present suffering without judgment” (Hayes et al., 2016, p. 405). Someone who engages in mindfulness is practicing awareness of thoughts, sensations, emotions, and behaviors with a sense of observing and allowing as a part of their experience rather than being swayed with reactivity, overly identifying, or jumping into meaning-making (Hayes et al., 2016).
Self-Kindness vs. Self-Judgment
Self-kindness is a warm relational process of turning towards oneself to soothe and offer comfort with a nurturing, gentle and supportive demeanor, allowing space for understanding and patience (Hayes et al., 2016).
How does Self-Compassion deal with Injustice?
According to Godden (2017), leading with love is a “radical epistemology” that challenges the systemic competitive nature of patriarchal systems that we unconsciously carry and see acted out in our environments (p. 414). hooks (1996) concurs by attesting that love is foundational, both in the action that dismantles dichotomies woven within the colonial culture of domination, and as an anchor to hold onto as dismantling will temporarily cause a loss of what is currently the ground our systems rely upon. As allies, to lead with love is a reminder to slow down and see the multitude of parts that are operating within every person’s system, and seek to understand their fears and pains that are the fire beneath words and actions that are harmful (Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020).
To strengthen our abilities as allies, Indigenous ontology tells us that everyone around us benefits as we do our inner work (Longclaws, 1994, cited by Hart, 2005). Neff and colleagues (2019) report that those with low levels of self-compassion tend to be kinder to others than to themselves, while those with high levels of self-compassion display similar amounts of kindness towards themselves as they do to others (p. 29). It is interesting to note that a lack of self-judgement or self-disparagement does not equate to the same results as proactive steps of self-kindness (Neff, 2003b, p. 234). What this suggests is that the state and trait of self-compassion creates a sustainable internal well of care and connection that nourishes one’s own needs while also being able to offer that care and support to others without the propensity for burnout.
Teaching self-regulation and modeling co-regulation is essential, yet not enough. I recognize that larger systems of power and oppression enact a threat response in individuals and communities, much of which is internalized and reinforced as our cultural constructions become the lenses we see through. Critical theory reminds us to continually steps back and question where ideas and systems comes from, as man-made perspectives and ways of seeing the world will disregard or lack the consideration and perspectives of those most marginalized in mainstream society.
Conclusion
Not only is there an increasing amount of research that suggests profound protective factors associated with the state and trait of self-compassion, there are also far-reaching positive attributes one develops with this skill that enhances wellness, well-being and prosocial behavior.
To learn more about how to practice this state and trait into your daily way of being, check out…
Kristin Neff’s work
My youtube channel has several self-compassion practices:
Slideshow presentation and practice
Yoga Nidra with self-compassion theme
And stay tuned to be in the know regarding my next group series, as self-compassion is an integral part of what I teach, practice, model and guide others to experience.
References
Devenot, N. (2023). Tescreal hallucinations: Psychedelic and Ai Hype as inequality engines. Journal of Psychedelic Studies, 7(S1), 22–39. https://doi.org/10.1556/2054.2023.00292
Godden, N. (2017). The love ethic: A radical theory for social work practice. Australian Social Work, 70(4), 405–416.
Hart, M. A. (2005). Seeking mino-pimatisiwin: An Aboriginal approach to helping. Fernwood Publ.
hooks, b. (1996). “Contemplation and Transformation.” In Dresser, M. (Ed.) (1996). Buddhist Women on the Edge: Contemporary Perspectives from the Western Frontiers, 287–92. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books.
Menakem, R. (2021). My grandmother’s hands: Racialized trauma and the pathway to mending our hearts and bodies. Penguin Books.
Neff, K. D., Tóth-Király, I., Yarnell, L. M., Arimitsu, K., Castilho, P., Ghorbani, N., Guo, H. X., Hirsch, J. K., Hupfeld, J., Hutz, C. S., Kotsou, I., Lee, W. K., Montero-Marin, J., Sirois, F. M., de Souza, L. K., Svendsen, J. L., Wilkinson, R. B., & Mantzios, M. (2019). Examining the factor structure of the self-compassion scale in 20 diverse samples: Support for use of a total score and six subscale scores. Psychological Assessment, 31(1), 27–45. https://doi.org/10.1037/pas0000629
Neff, K. D. (2003a). The development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion. Self and Identity, 2(3), 223–250. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309027
Neff, K. D. (2003b). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2, 85–102
Hayes, J. A., Lockard, A. J., Janis, R. A., & Locke, B. D. (2016). Construct validity of the self-compassion scale-short form among psychotherapy clients. Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(4), 405–422. https://doi.org/10.1080/09515070.2016.1138397
Raes, F., Pommier, E., Neff,K. D., & Van Gucht, D. (2011). Construction and factorial validation of a short form of the Self-Compassion Scale. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy. 18, 250-255.
Schwartz, R. C., & Sweezy, M. (2020). Internal family systems therapy (2nd ed.). The Guilford Press.
Siegel, D. J. (2023). Intraconnected: Mwe (me + we) as the integration of self, identity, and belonging. W. W. Norton & Company.
Villamil, A., Vogel, T., Weisbaum, E., & J. Siegel, D. (2018). Cultivating well-being through the three pillars of mind training: Understanding how training the mind improves physiological and psychological well-being. OBM Integrative and Complementary Medicine, 4(1), 1–16. https://doi.org/10.21926/obm.icm.1901003
Wong, Y.-L. R. (2018). “Please call me by my true names”: A decolonizing pedagogy of mindfulness and interbeing in critical social work education. In Batacharya, S. & Wong, Y-L. R. (Eds.). (2018). Sharing breath: Embodied learning and decolonization (pp. 253–277). essay, AU Press. Retrieved November 18, 2023, from https://ebookcentral-proquest-com.ezproxy.lib.ucalgary.ca/lib/ucalgary-ebooks/reader.action?pq-origsite=primo&ppg=264&docID=5574863.