In a conversation with an insightful and inspiring friend a few weeks ago, we were chatting about subconscious programming and how fascinating and difficult it is to reprogram the deeply ingrained beliefs and traumas from our past. I can’t remember exactly what she said, but she alluded to something I had shared about my personal experience with hypoarousal and that it sounds like my shut-down pattern is trying to teach me something. In that moment, I felt shivers move down my spine and I wiggled and smiled as I expressed what I was feeling. Her eyes brightened and she leaned in to say: “that means it’s true!”
In that moment, I agreed with her. “yeah that feels like truth” I said.
A few days later, speaking to my father on the phone, I shared this story with him and the un-deniable good feelings that prompted my friend and I to claim that insight as truth.
My father reminded me of the danger of this sentiment. Recalling his (and mine) upbringing in the Mormon religion, and how “feelings” were manipulated consistently to be evidence for truth or non-truth. Feelings were used as a way to enforce obedience. Feelings were a way to instill Fear.
He shared his memory of straying from the church in his adolescence and when he announced to his family and congregation, at 19 years old, that he has decided to “come back” and to serve his Mission for the church, he was applauded and celebrated. He said that felt so good that in that moment he took it as evidence that it must be true and it must be the right thing to do.
Our senses are not designed for the complexities of truth, of the Universe, and the nuances of bias and manipulation. We have a tendency for bias and to look for evidence that proves our limited purview as the “right way.”
“Our senses, after all, evolved on the African savannas hundreds of thousands of years ago: They were useful for keeping us alive, whether that meant avoiding a hungry lion or figuring out whether a certain leaf was safe to eat.” - Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Our senses are superb at picking up on danger signals, and innately inclined to find solace and vital space for “rest and digest” when we feel safe. What is “safe” objectively is not what is “safe” subjectively. What is it to be safe? Danger and safety signals to the individual - the subjective experience - is not necessarily aligned with objective truth. I can experience a danger signal from thinking about something in the past that was painful or imagining doom and gloom in my future. One person may experience a full on panic attack and be riddled with fear on an airplane while another person is flooded with safety, creativity and pleasure in the sky. Perhaps I hear an “authority” speak about how loving he/she is and the many stories that “prove this statement as true.” And maybe, this “authority” reminds me of someone I trust and feel good around. Simply through repetition and familiarity I may experience safety signals when I see this authority, yet that doesn’t mean it is objectively true, that’s just my experience.
The notion that “seeing is believing,” Neil DeGrasse Tyson writes in Astrophysics for People in a Hurry,
“...works well in many endeavors, including mechanical engineering, fishing, and perhaps dating.… But it doesn’t make for good science. Science is not just about seeing, it’s about measuring, preferably with something that’s not your own eyes, which are inextricably conjoined with the baggage of your brain. That baggage is more often than not a satchel of preconceived ideas, post-conceived notions, and outright bias.”
We are all susceptible to bias, and we all have history that colors our desires, assumptions, expectations and beliefs. Even scientists get things wrong.
“Sometimes, scientists get the details wrong. Working on the frontiers of knowledge means that data and evidence—even that which is uncovered and analyzed by trained scientists—will lead to honest mistakes. But the scientific method (and process of publication and peer review) means that claims are challenged and argued over. As Neil points out, the structure of science means that researching and arguing move scientists closer to the truth, even if there are small errors or blind spots along the way. Hardworking scientists, he says, are always going back to the drawing board—or are already there—as a way of getting a firmer sense of the object of their inquiry. The process isn’t always pretty, but it moves us in the right direction.” - Neil DeGrasee Tyson
What I am realizing is that being “right” is not the be-all-end-all. What matters most is our ability to express and communicate our beliefs, where they came from, what potential biases we are working with, and then be willing to engage, ask questions, be open to new data, and ultimately, be willing to be wrong.
As I am navigating the overload of misinformation and non-experts making bold claims or regurgitating tunnel-vision perspectives on complex topics, I am learning how to think more like a scientist.
I see this as the pathway to integrating and balancing the masculine and feminine within each one of us. Too much reliance on “feeling” and “intuition” increases the possibility of blind bias, seeing what we already believe, and confident delusion. Too much reliance on analyzing and pragmatism could disconnect us from deep wisdom, collective consciousness, immense joy, freedom and embodiment. We need both. We need to honor and engage the material universe and we need to stay open, curious and compassionate as we surrender to the Unmanifest Universe.
Imagine the expansion and innovation that awaits when we expand our field of vision and ask questions rather than trust “authority” or stay shackled to the impulsive reactions programmed into our mind and body.
There is truth in all perspectives, and Objective Truth is only what can be verified and re-created through measurable experiments. Everything else is opinion, personal truth and theory. There’s purpose and power in naming it while remaining open to new data.
It’s time to question everything and gain clarity in our own biases, assumptions, beliefs and expectations. Objective Truth will become more obvious as you do the work to let go of what you want to believe and open up to what else could be true.